


A pep talk & something more

by srslysterek



Category: High School Musical: The Musical: The Series (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-01-15
Packaged: 2021-02-24 20:40:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22164103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/srslysterek/pseuds/srslysterek
Summary: After Ricky and E.J have a heart to heart backstage, E.J realises that his feelings for Ricky Bowen stretched a lot further than just friendship.orThe one where E.J is head over heels for Ricky Bowen, who’s probably the biggest idiot known to mankind.
Relationships: Ricky Bowen/E.J. Caswell
Comments: 43
Kudos: 156





	1. the pep talk

**Author's Note:**

> Hey this is just a thing I wrote because my RJ heart combusted in ep 9, and I truly wish they had explored the scene with Ricky and EJ more. 
> 
> Yes I write “Mum”, I’m British luv.

"Hey!"

E.J spun around to see a flustered Ricky Bowen enter the room, and take off his top. E.J frowned, taken aback but at the same time, he had sensed there was something wrong with Ricky on stage. He had messed up a crucial part within the song and it had been strange as Ricky had been doing so well during rehearsals. So well in fact, that it had made E.J not want to play the part of Troy because Ricky was clearly made for it, not him.

"What's going on?" E.J questioned genuinely concerned, locking eyes with Ricky who seemed on the verge of tears. E.J had never seen him like this.

"You need to go on for me, as Troy." Ricky said, sticking out his hand which had the scrunched up basketball jersey in it.

"What?" E.J exclaimed, "But you're Troy!"

Was Ricky serious? They had already had one character change. Him going on as Troy would mean someone else would have to go on as Chad and that would be too confusing for the audience. The show would be a disaster.

"Yes but you saw how much I messed up out there!" Ricky replied exasperated, running a hand through his curls. "Please do this for me- I'm fucking up, I'm not concentrating and this is Nini's only chance at going to her fancy theater school in fucking Denver- I just.... I can't do it okay?"

"Hold on a second." E.J said in disbelief, staring at Ricky. "You do realise that me going on as Troy would be even more fucked up for Nini... I'm literally her ex boyfriend who stole her phone."

Ricky glared at him, becoming even more panicked. He stepped closer shoving the jersey against E.J's chest. " _Do it_."

"No." E.J replied and then grabbed him by the shoulders. "Ricky, you're fucking shaking."

"I can't even think E.J, just take the fucking role!" Ricky practically yelled and E.J sighed, turning away from him. He grabbed his bottle of water from the dressing table and held it out to Ricky. 

"Drink you fucking idiot."

"E.J, there's no time-"

"Yes there is." E.J replied firmly, "You are clearly not okay and need to calm down. The second act can wait."

Ricky opened his mouth to protest, but ultimately decided against it, and took the water. He went to try and open it but his hands were shaking and E.J furrowed his eyebrows. Ricky tried again and then let out a frustrated groan.

”Here, let me.” E.J said quietly and placed his hand over Ricky’s. Both of them stilled and E.J’s breath caught in his throat.

Why was this weird? It shouldn’t be. They were just two guys and he was helping out a friend. _A friend_. There had been a time where Ricky Bowen being his friend would have seemed against some type of law, seemed unnatural. But recently a mutual understanding had formed between them. E.J was most certainly over the Nini and Troy situation, realising how embarrassing his actions were, the Carlos fiasco being the last nail in the coffin, and Ricky was definitely civil towards him now. There was no reason for them to continue a rivalry. So yes, Ricky was classed as his friend.

”Dude, I’m not shaking anymore.” Ricky whispered and E.J looked down, startled. Ricky was right, he wasn’t shaking.

”Oh.” E.J said and then turned away from him, suddenly feeling extremely hot. _There is nothing weird about this, E.J,_ he thought to himself.

_Then why am I feeling like I did when I first met Nini?_

After thirty seconds of uncomfortable silence, Ricky spoke up.

”How come you won’t go on as Troy? This is what you've wanted from the start, isn’t it?”

E.J let out a small scoff and turned to Ricky again, leaning against the dressing table, arms folded.

”Want _ed_... past tense.” He paused. "During one of our rehearsals for Get'cha Head In The Game, I took a moment to watch you and dude... you are made for Troy." E.J let out a little laugh as Ricky's mouth dropped. "Don't make me start emoting Bowen, but this-" 

E.J picked up the jersey which Ricky had flung on the table.

"Is your role. And yours only."

Ricky smiled softly and E.J's stomach turned. _Oh God, not this. Not again. Not now. Not for Ricky Bowen._

"Wow I don't know what to say- I- thank you, E.J." 

"Will you tell me what got you so worked up?" E.J asked stepping closer to him, "You don't have to but-"

"My Mum's new boyfriend showed up she kissed him and I don't know... it just threw me off I guess." Ricky shrugged and gently took the jersey off E.J who let it slip through his fingers. E.J felt a sudden urge to go out there and yell at Ricky's Mum. Was there something wrong with her? He was no expert on divorce but he knew Ricky's parents had recently split and bringing a new partner just weeks after was insensitive and would throw anyone off. 

"Do this for you and your Dad." E.J said, placing a firm hand on Ricky's shoulder. "I saw the way he stood up for Miss Jenn, I saw the way he was so proud seeing you perform like that. Fuck your Mum and her new boyfriend. Your Dad loves you more than anyone, and I'm sure seeing me in your place would suck for him. You need to finish this for yourself, you've worked so hard."

Ricky didn't say anything and for a second, E.J thought he had perhaps overstepped a line. However, Ricky suddenly launched himself at E.J, pulling him into a bone crushing hug. He was strong for someone so scrawny. 

"Woah." E.J gasped, but hugged him back and at that moment, he knew that he was severely fucked.

”Thank you so much.” Ricky said, slightly out of breath as he pulled away. “I really needed that.”

”I’m glad I could help.” E.J smiled, although he was still trying to get over the fact Ricky had just hugged him.

”I’m sure your parents are proud of you.” Ricky commented as he shoved his jersey on, and E.J’s smile faltered _. They’re not even here tonight._

Ricky shot E.J one last look. “I’m glad we’re friends now.” 

E.J nodded, not having the words to reply and Ricky ran out of the room.

Well, he was truly fucked indeed.

This whole time he had thought he had been in love with Nini. It had now dawned on him that Nini had been nothing in comparison to what he had been feeling for Ricky. All those emotions over the past few months... building up to this moment. E.J had known he had never been 100% straight but looking back on it, girls had never satisfied him at all.

And Ricky Bowen was E.J’s confirmation, that he was 200% gay and at least 50% in love with Ricky.

”E.J Caswell, you have truly gone and complicated things for yourself, you fucking disaster.”


	2. IDNY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> loosely based on the song, The One by Jorja Smith! give it a listen because it describes how e.j’s feeling within himself!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is mainly a filler, delving into e.j’s home life, conflicted feelings and coming to terms with his sexuality.

It had been a week since school ended, since the High School Musical production had ended and since Gina had been living with Ashlyn. E.J was thrilled when Ashlyn's parents and Gina's mum had agreed to let Gina stay to finish the school year. There weren't any plans made for after that, but that was ages away.

Gina had celebrated Christmas with his and Ashlyn's family and it had been a nice change from their usual Christmases with Gina's sparkling personality. Already Gina had noticed E.J's tense relationship with his parents, specifically, his father. When she questioned him about it, he shut down.

Things had always been difficult with his parents. They were rolling in money, and for his whole life, E.J had always got what he wanted. However, the only thing he didn't get, was that feeling of being loved by them. They were wrapped in their business and were barely home most nights. E.J would reassure himself everyday that _they do love you, they're just busy._ They thought that throwing a wad of cash at him and asking him how his day went, was enough.

His Dad wanted E.J to get a scholarship at UCLA, so he could pursue water polo. He hated the fact E.J also did theatre and refused to acknowledge it, hence his parents not being at the show. E.J thought his Mum would at least turn up, but she had gone out with her friends.

E.J used to be able to ignore the feeling of neglection, immersing himself in his popularity, working hard to get a 4.3 GPA, concentrating on his music, buying himself superficial things... the list went on.

But the production was over and although he was grateful for Gina and Ashlyn's company, he still felt incredibly lonely.

And then there were these new found feelings for Ricky Bowen. He hadn't spoken to Ricky since their talk in the dressing room. E.J thought now that perhaps he had dived too deeply into the whole "being in love" thing and that it was probably only a small crush - coming to terms with his sexuality. Anyway, Ricky was straight and E.J was pretty sure that he was back with Nini, well from the looks of things.

E.J was sat across from Ricky and Nini in Ashlyn's house and wanted to be anywhere but there. Ashlyn had missed the theatre gang and had invited them over for the night, praying it wouldn't end up like Thanksgiving. E.J had missed them too but seeing Ricky and Nini all gross with each other made him want to gouge his eyeballs out.

"I need another drink." E.J said, standing up from his seat next to Carlos, and heading straight for Ashlyn's kitchen. He grabbed the bottle of vodka and opened it, cringing at the smell of nail polish remover. He poured himself a small glass, bringing it to his lips ready to down.

"Hey man."

E.J jumped, and the vodka split slightly. He cursed and licked the split contents off his hand before turning to the voice.

It was Ricky of course.

"Hey, want a drink?" E.J asked, feeling himself heat up.

Ricky grimaced, "I'm good. A bit strong for a little gathering don't you think?"

E.J scoffed, leaning against the kitchen counter. "Live a little Bowen."

"Are you okay?" Ricky asked quietly, taking E.J by surprise. "I just feel you've been a bit distant tonight... from everyone."

Had Ricky been watching him?

"How are you and Nini?" E.J questioned changing the subject and Ricky's face changed from concern to a slight giddiness.

"Fine, everything's kinda fresh right now I guess." Ricky replied. "Thanks again for what you did at the show, I needed that."

"Yeah don't worry about it." E.J said bluntly, and then gritted his teeth. "That's what friends are for."

_Friends._

Ricky frowned, "Yeah."

They stood in silence for a couple of seconds, staring at each other and E.J shifted uncomfortably. However, that silence was soon broken by Nini, who practically skipped into the kitchen.

"Ricky! We're about to look through pictures of the show." she exclaimed, grabbing his arm. "Come!"

He smiled at her, shooting E.J a nod, letting her pull him to the living room.

_Okay, maybe you do like LIKE Ricky... not love.. just like LIKE._

E.J groaned and downed the vodka, the intoxicating liquid burning his throat. As Sharpay Evans once said: this is not what I want, this is not what I planned.

E.J Caswell needed no one, and he firmly believed that.

****

“E.J what’s wrong with you?” Gina moaned, hitting him with a pillow. “You’ve been such a downer tonight.”

He had invited Gina and Ashlyn over for a movie night seeing as his parents were out and he didn’t want to feel alone. Ashlyn was currently making more popcorn in the kitchen.

“What do you mean?” E.J said. “I’m fine-“

“Cut the bullshit.” Gina rolled her eyes. “We just watched Mean Girls, which is one of your favourites and you didn’t smile once.”

E.J sighed, aggravated. How did this girl read him _so_ well?

“Well I just- okay.” E.J sat up from his slouched position on the couch, and turned to face Gina properly. “I think I like someone but I just don’t know? It’s way too complicated and h- they’re taken anyway. And I don’t want to like them, I don’t need them in my life... but these feelings are just...there, and they won’t. go. away.”

Gina nodded understandingly. Her face had softened and E.J scowled. He hated sympathy.

“Maybe,” Gina started, “You should tell him.”

“Him?” E.J repeated, eyes wide.

“Yes.” Gina chuckled. “It could not be anymore obvious. You’re as gay as they come, Caswell.”

“That obvious, huh?” E.J sighed and Gina nodded.

“Hun, you still watch Glee, your favourite movie is Mean Girls and you’d pick theatre over water polo any day.”

“Has he finally found out he’s gay?” Ashlyn said bluntly, entering the room with a bowl of popcorn. E.J’s mouth dropped.

“YOU KNEW?”

“Yes?”

“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?”

“I thought you knew yourself and that you were just scared to come out.” Ashlyn said, placing the bowl on the table.

E.J slouched back, slightly shocked and then pulled out his phone, opening up twitter.

_I’m gay_. He typed, and went to tweet it but hesitated, his finger hovering over the tweet box.

Oh hell, what did he have to lose?

He sent the tweet and locked his phone.

Gina winked. “Proud of you.”

“And me.” Ashlyn added. “It was about time.”

_You don’t need anyone, E.J. It’s you VS the world._

He reached for the remote. “Okay, what are we watching next?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> planning on making this multi-chapter, so stay tuned :)


	3. if only you knew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ricky finds out E.J's gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's the third chapter! sorry for the late update:)

Ricky Bowen didn't like change. He hated it.

The first half of this semester had been too much change for him, with his parents splitting and the whole Nini breakup, Gina moving and his mum's new boyfriend. However, now he was finding normalcy again. He finally had Nini back and to him, she represented his normalcy but he still felt like things would never go back to what they used to be. Strangely he was okay with that. Did that mean he had also changed? The whole production had been a completely different but stimulating experience for him, and although he originally joined to impress Nini, he carried on because he felt free _,_ he felt happy, he felt at _home._ He now had a second family. 

He thought about Nini and how he had finally told her he loved her, how they had shared that passionate kiss and how now, even though there was no label on it, they were together again. But he couldn't help feel as if something was missing. Ricky looked at Nini and knew he loved her but there was still this underlying feeling of... he couldn't even put it into words. Maybe because it was so fresh and even though they had been in a relationship before, this was definitely disparate.

Ricky flung his jacket onto the floor and then collapsed on his bed, exhaling loudly. He had just done an hour of skating, aggressive skating at that, to clear his head for a while. He reached for his phone which was in the depths of his grey joggers, and frowned at his lockscreen. The theater groupchat was going _crazy._ And all of the incoming messages seemed to be congratulating E.J. 

"What the hell is going on?" Ricky muttered to himself, and unlocked his phone, clicking on their groupchat. He tried scrolling to the top but caught sight of Nini's message. 

_**e.j, i just saw ur tweet and i'm so proud of you <3 imma post on insta rn ** _

Ricky exited their groupchat, and opened up Twitter. He didn't even need to search E.J because his whole timeline was talking about it and-

Oh my God. 

Ricky nearly dropped his phone on his face. 

E.J Caswell was gay.

He sat up straight, feeling his pulse speed up. 

"There's no fucking way." he whispered. He stared at E.J's tweet, which had now reached a thousand likes and three hundred retweets, mouth dry. 

Was this the same E.J Caswell who had stolen his girlfriend? Had he always been gay or was this some recent discovery? Regardless, it was a shock to Ricky's system and he was finding trouble comprehending it. Before he could even think about what to do next, his phone was ringing. Nini's face flashed across the screen and he sighed. 

"Hello?" 

"Have you seen the groupchat?" Nini exclaimed excitedly, "E.J's gay!"

"Yeah I just saw." Ricky said, trying to sound happy but somehow it came out more miserable. 

"Isn't that amazing? I always thought but... I just didn't want to assume you know? Even when we were together, there were some things- I couldn't put my finger on it but now it all adds up." Nini rambled and Ricky gritted his teeth. 

"Yeah great."

"What's wrong with you?" Nini scowled, noticing his bad mood, "You should be happy for him. Don't tell me you guys are still enemies or whatever-"

"No!" Ricky cut her off, "We're definitely not, we're friends. I just... I don't know how to feel. It's so sudden." 

"What do you mean?" Nini's voice suddenly turned cold. "Discovering your sexuality takes time Ricky, it's not something you suddenly just decide, like joining a musical. This is something serious and personal and we all have to be there to support him. Why are you being so weird?"

"You're right." Ricky said, _she was._ "I'll message him now." 

"Good." Nini replied, "Are we still on for the movies tomorrow?"

"Yeah!"

"Cool! Okay, I gotta go so love you, bye!" 

"Love you too." he murmured and the call ended. Of course Nini was right, E.J needed all the support he could get right now and Ricky was all for it - his initial reaction had just been from shock. E.J had been there for him when he was on verge of a panic attack, and Ricky could definitely be there for E.J whilst he was becoming who he truly was. 

He searched E.J in his contacts and began typing. 

**_Hey man, sorry I just saw your tweet but congratulations! It's awesome that you feel you can finally express who you truly are. I think it's incredibly brave. If you ever need to talk then I'm here. Sending my love._ **

He pressed send, feeling pleased with himself and then laid back down on his bed again. 

Yep, things were definitely never going to be the same again. 

****

E.J stared at Ricky's text message, contemplating what to say. He had probably been contemplating for ten minutes now. He didn't know why the message had shocked him. Maybe because he just expecting a small congratulations from Ricky on the groupchat, or on Twitter. This was personal. The only other person to have messaged him separately had been Carlos, and Nini had posted for him on Instagram - he hadn't been expecting separate messages anyway.

E.J began typing.

_**Thanks for your support, now go make out** **with** **Nini you fucking fuck**_

E.J pursed his lips, irritated with himself and his pettiness, and scrapped it, throwing his phone on the floor. Something would come to him.

"What did your phone ever do to you?" Gina asked, taking a pause from painting his toe nails, to look at his phone which had landed nearby her as she knelt. E.J didn't know how they had gone from watching movies to manicures - Gina was incredibly persuasive. Ashlyn took a quick picture of them, E.J flipping her off in the process. 

"Out of all colours, you just _had_ to choose fluorescent pink?" E.J grimaced and Gina looked up at him, shooting him a wink. 

"It looks cute!" 

He sighed and Ashlyn smiled fondly at him - she was so proud of E.J and how far he had come as a person. Before, she was the only one who could tolerate him properly and that was because she was the only one who knew what E.J Caswell was truly like. She was glad other people were discovering E.J's other side, and appreciating him, he needed more of that in his life.

"Guys." E.J started, grabbing the girls' attention, "Hypothetically, if someone messaged me...someone I liked....and congratulated me on coming out, hypothetically of course, how should I respond?"

Ashlyn frowned, "Are you sure you're being hypothetical?"

"Yes!"

Gina looked at him with an eyebrow raised, then looked to his phone and then back to E.J again, and it suddenly dawned on her. She gasped and E.J's eyes widened, and then they both moved at once. 

"Oh boy." Ashlyn murmured as E.J fell off the sofa, grabbing Gina's arm whilst she scrambled to get his phone. 

"Get off me!"

"No!"

"I'm a black belt in karate!"

"I'm water polo champion of the state!"

"Don't you even dare think about tickling me Caswell- E.J OH MY GOD- STOP-STOP!" Gina squealed and Ashlyn face palmed - somehow when those two were together, they shared one collective braincell. She walked over to the tangle of limbs, picking up E.J's phone and clearing her throat. They both stopped, turning to look up at her. E.J's whole body seized with panic. 

"Ashlyn give me my phone!" 

He tried to stand, but Gina grabbed him, pinning him to the floor. 

"Jesus Christ, Porter!" E.J groaned, "What are you made of? Rock?"

Ashlyn stared at the lockscreen as it flashed - they were messages from Ricky. 

_**E.J?** _

_**Look I know we aren't close friends but is there a reason you ignored my message?** _

_**You've read it? I can literally see??** _

"Holy shit!" Ashlyn gasped, "You like RICKY?"

E.J let his body go loose, banging his head on the floor, wanting the ground to swallow him whole. There was a stunned silence. 

"E.J you could have told us... we don't care." Gina said, sliding off his back. He raised his head, knowing his face was crimson.

"Well now you fucking know." he snapped. "Can I have my phone back?" 

Ashlyn nodded, handing it over. "You might wanna reply to him." 

E.J felt sick as he stared at Ricky's messages. Now he definitely had to reply. Gina peered over his shoulder. 

"Tell him that you're sorry and you were watching movies with Ashlyn and I and so you wanted to reply later instead. And also thank him for his support."

E.J began typing, whilst both Ashlyn and Gina carefully monitored. 

**_Hey Ricky, sorry for not replying. I read it and wanted to reply later as I was watching a movie with Gina and Ash. Thank you for your support, it means a lot. Hope you're good :)_ **

As soon as he sent it, Ricky had read it, and was replying. 

_**Oh okay, don't worry about it. I thought you didn't like me again or something!** _

"Aw." Gina cooed. "He wants you to like him! That's a good sign E.J!" 

E.J glared at her. "He's literally dating Nini." 

"Look at the positives!" 

_**I could never not like you again.** _

E.J hesitated slightly, but pressed send and Ashlyn smiled at him sadly. 

"You've got it bad, huh?" 

E.J nodded miserably and both girls enveloped him in a tight embrace. E.J gladly accepted their affection, needing it badly. At least he didn't have to go through this all alone now. 

His phone flashed, and the three of them broke apart so E.J could check it. 

_**I'm glad because me too.** _

E.J sighed. _If only you knew Ricky, if only you knew._ The small silence that fell upon the three of them was broken by Gina letting out a groan.

"Your nail polish smudged. I'm going to have to redo it!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and there you have it! sorry this is going kind of slow, but from next chapter onwards it will pick up a bit - i'm going for a slow burn so you're in for a ride guys and lots of drama. tell me what you think! lots of love<3  
> i also love writing about gina, ash and e.j as a trio if you couldn't tell, they make me soft


End file.
